Monday, August 19, 2013

i wanted him to be happy

I found out that Lee Thompson Young committed suicide today. I just wish he hadn't been so sad. I wanted him to be happy. I've been bad off even before I found out - just tired. I can't sleep without my neck hurting since I bought that new bed, so after work I bought a memory foam mattress and 2 different types of pillows. The lack of quality sleep is catching up to me. After I put the memory foam on top of the bed, I sat on the floor and listened to James Morrison songs for an hour and cried at all the beautiful lyrics. "Save Yourself" has been on repeat in my head these past days.

I'm trying to change to make the best for us
But I'm just the same, same as I ever was
Oh and if you stay with me, honestly it's what I want
But if you stay with me, I know I'll hurt you more

So won't you save, save yourself
By leaving me now for someone else?
If I'm crying out, don't listen to it
It's only my heart, save yourself
It's only my heart

There's no other musician whose lyrics speak to me like his. His songs have gotten me through hard times before, and they probably will again. I need to sit back and do nothing but listen more often.

I miss Bobbi. It'll be three years in December.

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