Is this childish -
There's something I like about the number 23. Is it because it's prime? I remember numbers and fiddle with number patterns in my head though, so there's probably not much to it. I once read a book where this religious character was obsessed with finding meaning from numbers in the Bible, which is easy since all the verses are numbered. This was a novel, so he dramatically took it way too far and screwed up his kids. What is it like to live constantly looking for omens in all the numbers? And then each culture has different ideas about which numbers are good. I was taught that 7 is good because it's in the Bible somewhere. But in Chinese/Korean/Japanese culture 8 is the best number, hence the Beijing Olympics start date of 8/8/08 and even my favorite Korean rapper G-Dragon getting an 8-star dragonball tattoo (and yes, he was born in '88, the year of the dragon). And then I heard that 4 is unlucky (it sounds almost like the word for death). 13 is taboo in the US. All those rock stars keep dying when they turn 27. I'm not even going to get started on colors. On dream interpretations. On names.
I once wrote a research paper on omens in the ancient Near East, so I know that this desire to find meaning in random occurrences/combinations is at least as old as human civilization. Although ancient omens were sought in the pattern of sheep guts and other entrails. Divination. Portents. All iffy stuff. Each type has rules, but is open for interpretation. I can't tell you how many times I've tried to see patterns in the tea leaves at the bottom of my cup. No luck - I must be drinking the tea wrong or something.
So what is it about humans that when we look for significance, we find it? I doubt signs, but intuition has served me well. Take Bud, I knew that wasn't going to work out, but it took my brain a while to spot the reasons why. And yesterday I was completely validated because he's still in love with his ex-girlfriend. And if past relationships have taught me anything, it's respect for someone who can't get over someone else. It literally took me years to get over my college love, but I didn't go around dating other people to try and get over it. I kept my misery to myself, thanks. I knew there was nothing another guy could do for me. Just time. I hope Bud realizes that, but for guys, trying to get over it is hooking up with other girls. So can this be the one and only time in my life I'm one of the other girls?
Practical note - I need to eat more. I went running and my breathing was fine, but my legs were weak. Nooooo.