grow a pear

There's a yearly 5mile run near my mom's hometown called Brian's Run. Thanksgiving weekend so I'll be in town. I figured I'd run - the titular Brian is my mom's cousin. Lately, running goes by really fast if I'm chatting with a friend. But none of my friends in PA run for fun! I can't find anyone to do it with me. AJ is a maybe and that's all I've got.

Aren't mid-run pictures awesome in their awkward?

Three more days of work left before Thanksgiving, and if today is any indication, cold days they'll be. I love to run, but I draw the line at 40 degrees. Anything less, and I don't care how bundled up I am - too much snot to cope with will drip from my nose. Have you ever carried a wad of wet tissues around in your pocket for 3 miles? It's not worth it. Still, I had a weak moment and bought a bunch of bread on Wednesday. At this rate I'm going to put on pounds before my beach vacation.

I want to eat one now.

I finished watching Heartless City, and my crush on Jung Kyung-ho is rekindled. Why are all the hot ones players? Somebody's got to be, I guess. Don't hate the player, all that... The characters dressed so well in HC. Can their wardrobe stylist style me? I spent an hour listening to the soundtrack on repeat.

A hot man who READS?! Help me. I can't deal.

Spent the weekend feeling bad - mentally, not physically. Actually it started on Thursday, peaked Friday, stayed with me Saturday, and there's no way I can sustain that level of depression, so it's pretty much gone today. Worrying did it.

I keep telling myself to grow a pair.

Will I rewatch City Hunter? I still remember overall what happens, but I've mostly forgotten the details. I'd only rewatch Lee Min-ho in that or in Faith. I know, there's no accounting for good taste.

pomegranate

Lately I feel like I can't take in enough air. Except when I'm running. This isn't a metaphor.
I have a craving for a pomegranate.
The weather channel website is dead to me b/c all of the advertisements are close-up pictures of spiders.
I keep food poisoning myself. I'm pretty sure my mom never food poisoned me, but now I'm wondering how she did that all those years.

I want a dress this color.

live more more MORE

Does anyone else find dating embarrassing? I watch ridiculously saccharine K/TW dramas, and I'm fine with all the lovey dovey - when it's in the screen. Yes, I'm flattered when someone says it to me, but then when I have to say something back, I get embarrassed. I almost trigger the gag reflex, even though I mean what I'm typing. Yes, I'm not at the point where I can say it in person. I'm just so bad at flirting. It takes me forever to come up with the cute phrases that come naturally to others. Too sweet.

If you could: penthouse apt in the city, a suburban monstrosity with 2 acres, or a sprawling rural farm where you don't actually have to do any farming? I'd pick the rural farm, provided it's an hour away from a big city, 15 minutes from the suburbs, so I won't travel far for groceries/work/clothes.

Yesterday I met MW at an outlet mall about 20 minutes from my apt. I hadn't been there since 2007. I found skirts from Loft for $4.77. I accept the fact that I will wear skirts all winter, and now I'll move on to creating a delicious collection of sweaters to go with the skirts.

Got sucked into text messaging today. Mostly on purpose to remind myself that there are a bunch of people I have relationships with (not just replying to S's texts). It felt like the old AIM days, except everyone's slow at texting with touch screens. I want to buy some chapstick, but I don't want to quite enough to get dressed and leave the house. I need to live more outside of work, that's for sure.

haiku

It's gotta be you 
all the way
all that i ever wanted
i promise you i will be true
it's only you
I watched T.O.P's new music video and came away with an old BSB lyric in my head. Been that kind of night. Thanks, Two Weeks.

Studied up on haikus b/c my aunt posted one on the book of faces and asked me if it was any good. So I learned new words in wikipedia:

metonym(n)-a figure of speech in which a thing or concept is called not by its own name, but rather by the name of something associated in meaning w/ that thing or concept; for example, Wall Street implies corporate America, the pen implies the written word, Hollywood implies the film industry

caesura(n)-a complete pause in a line or poetry or in a musical composition <---I actually used to know this one, but it's been 4 years since I took Advanced Poetry in school, so I forgot

kigo(n)-a defined word or phrase that symbolizes or implies the season of the poem, often in the form of a metonym; for example, cherry blossom implies spring, pumpkin implies autumn <---apparently Japanese haiku writers referenced books of kigo phrases, and here I thought they came up with them on their own

kireji(n)-cutting word typically found at the end of a line or verse. It may cut the stream of thought, suggesting a parallel between the preceding and following phrases, OR provide a dignified ending, concluding the verse with a heightened sense of closure; for example, -, ...

After all that, of course I had to take a crack at haikus, which I have never written successfully. I think I concentrate on the 5-7-5 too much and forget to put any substance into the poem at all.

The sharp scent of grass
expands lungs drowning inside.
I need to get out.

Aka, I drove home with the window open just so I could breathe in the fresh air. Inside air is so stifling, and my knee acted up this week, so I didn't run, therefore didn't get outside.

My director was funny - he popped into the office to announce an alpaca festival at the county fair this weekend and said he loves alpacas and can't wait to pet them. He's usually so serious and concerned that I have no clue what he likes. No doubt he's hilarious when he gets home to his family.

go through a dozen eggs

Just finished the last episode of Just You. It was serious fluff. I had to wait until the last 2 minutes to watch the only scene I cared about. TW dramas... literally every single person in the office wound up with their true love in the end, except the coolest guy, who accepted that he didn't get the girl and went back to his playa player ways. Oh if the female lead had any sense, she would have taken that one. But the heart wants what the heart wants. I guess. And the heart doesn't want Dean Fujioka because???? All I'm saying is that he will probably always be hotter than Aaron Yan. Aaron is mostly just pretty adorable. Let's face it, the whole cast was adorable and it didn't help that their wardrobe consisted almost entirely of pastels. I need to stop wearing black.

okay, Aaron looks too smug for his own good

How's my life going? Regular knee problems. Traffic jams. Stupid boys. I don't know. I don't know. I need to read my apartment lease again and see when I'm supposed to start haggling to keep the rent the same rate. If it's 90 days, then wow, that's the end of this month that I need to head on over. So many bills. Whyyy.

Went on localharvest.org and almost decided to sign up with a company that sells you food every week that's fresh and from local farms. If I was a bit richer, I would. Also, there's no way I eat a dozen eggs by myself every week. It takes me two weeks to go through a dozen eggs. Man, I really need to get the oven sitch sorted out.

Found the ring in my diamond candle. It's $10& too big!!!!!

push over | over sight?

Veteran's Day. I woke up in PA in my parents' house, in the room I used to sleep in when I was in high school, and where I haven't slept since I graduated from undergrad. My parents are not the kind to leave a room sitting there, my youngest sister uses it now. It was much neater when I was there. I don't know - I just like having space to move around in.

I remembered to bring the diamond candle home. Frustratingly enough, it's taking forever to burn down to the ring. I don't think it's going to happen tonight. Tomorrow then. I just want it to be pretty.

I realized that I already have an emotional attachment to S, as in to the personality that comes through via text every day, which is just a shadow of the real person. Hence the reason why I feel it's misleading.

Rewatching "27 Dresses," mostly because my sisters are convinced that I am like the movie's main character. If it meant I was tall and superficially pretty like Katherine Heigel, I wouldn't be insulted, but they mean as in the personality of the main character, so I'm insulted-don't like to think of myself as a pushover. Next time they bring it up, I should ask them which one of them is the lying annoying younger sister. Ah well, maybe it just means I'm bound to fall in love with a man as gorgeous as James Marsden one day. Mah hah!

james marsden

500 dollar chips

Yet again the 401(k) has defeated me! I hate it so much. I made it a little farther than before, but what the heck am I supposed to invest in? All the choices mean nothing to me. Ahhhh. I'm going to have to get serious financial planning assistance.

On the S front, I guess it's going well. Just slowly, which I need it to go.

Help me.

Don't condemn me to the cotton fields of $500 chips!!! -Rush Hour

i wore my mint green pants again

Beautiful day. I went walking around in the woods with S. It didn't decide much. Why are guys always in such a rush? I just can't tell. I can't tell at all.

Time to wipe the make up off my eyes.