some kind of fog

I've called home every day since I got back to my apartment and the news about my poppi is good. He might be getting out of he hospital as I type. My dad didn't know. But one of my aunt's is going to stay with my grandparents for a few days, so that's a good sign. I just... You don't know how much begging I did. I guess it's called praying. And here I am crying again, in some kind of fog. Fog because I have to hold it in for hours at work, try to function, although even strangers can read me like a book.

Did the running group thing. 6 of us set out, but I dropped off halfway through and only ran 3 miles. I need to eat differently - I felt weak at the beginning of the run, which featured another killer hill that I didn't make it up without walking. And to think on Hibernia runs I start out with a hill a half mile long and I'm fine. I'm a total hill conqueror there.

Feeling insecure. Going to drown my self in fiction.